nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
