I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Randomize
