called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
