Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
