We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Pants 0. Shit 1.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
