I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
