I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
