I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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