In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I'm too high and old for this...
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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