it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
