Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Randomize