Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
He has the fingertips of a God
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
