Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
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