My nipple is on Facebook.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
She even gives head with a lisp.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
