The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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