so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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