You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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