i just google imaged poop.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Randomize
