I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
