Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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