Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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