i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Randomize
