is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
