No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
