We're like a lot better than the average bears
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
