so that wasnt chicken after all
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
