Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Randomize