Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
