Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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