I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
