chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
