I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Your topless pictures make me question reality
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
