her vagine was all disorganized.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
