loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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