dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
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