Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
