he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
