physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
honey bunches of taint.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
