Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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