well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
