How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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