So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
