my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Randomize
