this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Randomize
