Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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