You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
