Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Randomize
