FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
