its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Randomize
