how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
